Sunday, February 17, 2013

Hello. My Name is Amber and I am an Addict.

Yes, that is right.  I am an addict.  A blogging addict that is.  I am totally addicted to reading all of your blogs and the comments you leave on my blog.  I find myself refreshing constantly to see if there are any new comments or to see if any of you have left a new post!  Yep.  I've gone over the edge.  I am addicted.  Haha!

I am so grateful for the chance to connect with all of you.  I have found that it has really been a great outlet for me to tell my story and to make it through the grieving process.  While I was pregnant, I went through a period of time that I was really scared and leery to read about miscarriages.  Now I am drawn to those blogs because I can relate and sympathize on a whole different level.  I am also drawn to the pregnancy blogs and success stories, just as I was before.  I love to read about positive bfp's, birth stories, and hear about your kids as they get older.  I am living vicariously through you.

I love to find a blog that I am interested in and start at the beginning.  I start on the very first post and catch up to present day.  I read it just like I am reading a book.  So if you find random comments from me on posts dating back a few years, well, now you know why!  I am reading your story.  Obviously this takes a lot of time, so don't be offended if you don't find these comments on your blog.  I just haven't gotten to yours yet!  lol  And really, there is just too many wonderful people and blogs out there to get to them all.

I want to thank all of you for being willing to share your stories, the good times, the struggles, and the heartaches.  I want to thank you for your friendship and extend my friendship to those of you I may not have had the chance to meet yet (in the blogging world).  I especially want to thank those that have even gone beyond the blogging world through texting and email.  Your friendship and compassion mean a lot.

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In other news, I did go to my sister's ultrasound appointment on Friday.  It's different this time around going with her, as I have a whole new perspective now that I have personally had my own ultrasounds.  We got to see a beautiful heartbeat.  It appeared to be strong and fast.  I thought it was strange that the doctor didn't let us hear it.  I guess that will come at the next appointment.
 
She was a little unsure of the due date.  According to the start of Sis's cycle, the due date would be September 17th.  However, the fetus is measuring smaller than that so the doctor figures she had a late ovulation, so might be due later than that.  Sis goes in for another ultrasound in about 2 weeks.  We'll find out then.
 
I thought it might be hard for me to go to the appointment with them, but it wasn't at all.  I was excited to see the little blob and could easily pick up the flicker of the heartbeat.  I didn't even have a shed of discomfort, and didn't feel any heartache at all.  I was just happy to be there with my sister and her husband, and the fact that they included me in their appointment.
 
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Hubby and I have been laying in bed all weekend with colds. We have quarantined ourselves from each other though.  He's had the couch and I've had the bedroom because we think we have two different things.  My cold is all in my sinuses and I have a lot of (uhh hmmm) snot.  His is all in his throat.  Hopefully we will feel better tomorrow and we can go to work.  We both work with a lot of old people - excuse me, I mean seniors.  They don't appreciate it very much if you even sneeze.

40 comments:

  1. Since your an addict I'm part of an awesome fb grow of infertilies. It's so nice to chat daily with other people that get it. Let me know if you'd like an invite.

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    1. Is it a closed group? Meaning, will my in real life be able to track me to my blog from the fb group? As of right now, my sister and my husband are the only 2 irl people that know about my blog and I'd like to keep it that way for awhile so I've hesitated to join anything on fb that might lead them to my blog inadvertently.

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  2. I'm addicted too! Although I am finishing up the last semester going back for my bachelor's so I don't have that much time and it's too bad, because I would much rather be reading blogs and leaving comments that writing a paper. See, even now I am supposed to be working on my presentation for tomorrow, but instead I came over here and started reading your blog. Ugh. It's a sickness.

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    1. Haha! Yes it is a sickness, but it's a fun and rewarding sickness :) good luck with all your studies! Now, get back to that paper!

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  3. I went through an addict phase too. I was totally obsessed with all things "making baby". I think its totally normal to want to connect with people who "get it".

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    1. I'm an avid reader anyway, and I've always liked "true stories." Nothing better than reading true stories that I can relate too :)

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  4. I, too, am an addict! And I have a lot of free time on my hands right now so it's bad. Sigh. Nice to know I'm not the only one!
    So glad the u/s appointment was easy for you. I can never tell what will be easy or hard for me. I'll completely dread having to go to a baby shower then get there and it's totally fine and I'm not feeling bad at all. Other times I can't even be in the same room as a pregnant woman. ah, infertility.

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    1. Yes, nice to know we aren't the only ones! I just really look forward to all your updates, so I find myself checking throughout the entire day. And then of course I have to check to see if anyone leaves a comment on my posts!! It's an addiction.

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  5. I like to go back and read blogs from the very beginning too; you're not the only one. :)

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    1. I've read your entire story already :) I can't wait to hear about your baby boy when he decides to join us outside your tummy! That's coming up soon!

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  6. I love your posts, so I m grateful that you are an addict. ;-) I am becoming one myself. It is nice to know that people read and respond to me ramblings; those related to infertility and those not.
    I really hope you feel better soon!!

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    1. Thank you Teresa! It's so nice that you and others actually enjoy my blatherings!

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  7. So glad that your sister's ultrasound went well. Glad you were able to enjoy being there, too.

    Hope you both are feeling well soon! Being sick sucks.

    I love to read blogs, too. I love the connections and am quite grateful for the community. It's helped me through some pretty rough times.

    Now I'm going to share the wonder of stats (for your own blog) with you. It's pretty interesting. :) It's free, so have fun! http://statcounter.com/ (email if you have any questions about it)

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    1. Thanks! I signed up for the statcounter thing, but am not really sure what it does for me yet! lol

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    2. My favorite parta are getting to see who comes to the blog, where they come from, how long they stay, what they read...you can see so much about who visits your blog!

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    3. Yeah I knowing the stats! I just have to figure out how to use it. I still don't know how to do a lot of things on my blog and it drives me crazy! Lol. I'm not very good at computer stuff.

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  8. i could not agree more. i always look back to the start it helps me as well. i also know that blogs have been the way i have learned about IF. every new idea, hgh, endo biopsy mostly came from a blog. i have learned that although my center is state of the art it is all about staying informed and driving this show. i dont trust that they will figure it out. i trust me more.

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    1. Exactly! We learn so much from each other!

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  9. Amber I wouldn't recommend that group on facebook. It was my old group and I think you would have a real issue with it like I did. Just a heads up. I know you are a very positive person.

    Btw I think your family is amazing! I know my sister would have done the same thing for me, but she is the only family I have. I love that you can go through this with so much support!

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    1. I was wondering about that! I always hesitate to join fb if there is a chance it can link me to my blog anyway. I'm still trying to keep my blog fairly private from my "in real life" people.

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  10. This is so nice to read. Sometimes you're not sure how big your support network really is, especially when you're at the beginning, like I am, and your story probably isn't all that interesting yet. I've been completely floored by the fact that I have any readers at all. :) It's such an amazing thing! Oh, and I'm also a start to finish reader, except I don't have all that much time on my hands, so I've only read a couple this way at this point! It's such a nice way to build hope!

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    1. Awww, thanks! It really is amazing...every time I get a new follower I get SO excited :) I am going to have to come check out your blog soon. I've seen your comments on other blogs and have been meaning to anyways!

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  11. What I've enjoyed from reading so many blogs is that I feel that we'd probably be friends in real life and infertility has connected us via the online world. NB I find that the doppler on our office ultrasound usually won't pick up a fetal heart tone at less than 8 weeks. Glad everything went well at her visit!

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    1. Yes! I am so happy and amazed with all the friendships I've developed in the blogging world already! I have found myself thinking that same thing many times - that I feel we'd probably be friends in real life if we had the chance.

      That is nice to know about the office doppler. At her smallest measurement she was 8weeks, 1 day.

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  12. Reading blogs is TOTALLY an addiction, but a beneficial addiction I think! I honestly don't know how I would have made it through some of the tougher times without being able to find ladies who can relate to all of this! Hope you and your hubby feel better soon!

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    1. Yes, yes, and yes! I love the blogging world :)

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  13. I am in the same boat! My husband and I had a conversation yesterday about the fact that I need to set some boundaries with myself in regards to how much time I spend blogging and reading (more reading than blogging as of right now). Anyways, it was so sweet to read about your sister's ultrasound and your feelings about it. You really are a model for healing. I'm sure you don't always feel that way, but I really admire your fortitude.

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    1. That is so funny that you just had the conversation with your hubby! Yes, sometimes we do need to set boundaries. My husband thinks it's great that he has a "little blogger wife." lol He is always asking me how his little blogger wife is doing.

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  14. I go through phases of addiction. LOL.
    Thoroughly enjoy reading your posts. I have a few favorite blogs, and your's is right there at the top. Thanks for sharing with us.

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    1. Oh goodness, you're making me blush. Not really, but that does mean so much to me that I am on your favorite list! I find it humbling that the thoughts I share are of so much interest to others! Makes me feel good. I have really enjoyed your blog too. It's one of the first ones I read from start to present day!

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  15. You are such a tough cookie and an inspiration. I am addicted to your blog - so there's that.

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    1. Lol Andy! Thank you. I'm addicted to yours too, although you've been slacking on your posts! With very good reason I might add. I have actually really enjoyed the friendship we've made. I just wish it was under different circumstances. Just know it has meant so much to me that you have been willing to grieve our losses together.

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  16. I do the same thing, the refreshing for new posts! I hope you're feeling much better!

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    1. Yep, I love getting the updates. I still have a pretty nasty cold. I've been through an entire box of Kleenex by myself in the last 24 hours. Ugg.

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  17. I thought I commented on this post already, but I don't see it!! I love reading your posts, and I always get excited when I see new posts from some of my favourite blogs (inlcuding yours!) You are an inspiration to stay strong and positive :)

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    1. Awww thanks! I can't even begin to tell you how touched I am to have you and others follow my blog. It really means a lot! I find it amazing that I am inspiring to others, when I find so much encouragement and inspiration from YOU!

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  18. I am not surprised but so extremely happy that you enjoyed sis' appointment!! You are truly an amazing person! Had to LOL over the quarantine!!! You both are just
    special!! Auntie

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  19. Do you ever have time to read books anymore? I know how much time I have spent just
    reading your blog and you are reading WAY MORE!!! How do you even manage to get to work or get any sleep at all? Auntie

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  20. Haha...I'm commenting on this super old post because I am doing the same to you--reading from start to finish. I'm enjoying reading your journey...especially since I peeked at the ending and know you are pregnant! I'm a high school coach too (volleyball) so I feel like I relate to you. I just started blogging about my own short infertility journey, and I'm excited to join this community that you are so connected to.

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    1. I love gettin comments on these old posts! Thank you so much for being interested in my story enough to go through and read everything! I'm going to have to go find your blog so I can "meet" my newest blogging friend :)

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