Friday, May 1, 2015

MIL Update

I decided to delete my last post.  I know I didn't write anything disrespectful, but I began to imagine if my MIL somehow came across it.  My blog isn't exactly anonymous.  I only know of 3 people in my real life that even know I have a blog, but it wouldn't be hard for someone to accidentally come across it.  Anyway, I thought it would be best if I deleted the post to prevent potential hurt feelings.  I'm not sure how I feel about censoring what I write....  Is there a way to make certain posts private?  I've seen a few blogs have password protected posts, but I have absolutely no idea how to do that or even if it's possible on Blogger.

I thought I'd give you an update on the situation though.  When I talked to MIL on Monday, following our rough weekend, she was at work and had a lot on her plate at the time.  My 5 year old niece (her granddaughter) had a lump removed from her throat and was in the hospital overnight.  MIL was helping with her big sister so the parents could deal with their baby having surgery.  The lump turned out to be just that - a lump, and not cancerous.  Thank the Lord there shouldn't ever be any more issues.

Once things settled down again, MIL called me yesterday.  She said, "we're going to be together for a long time, and I just want to be sure we're all on the same page."  She apologized for making me feel bad, as that was never her intention.  She also explained that she will never keep anything from me, the mom, when it comes to something my kids eat just in case they ever have a bad reaction.

She could have easily passed off Ayden eating a cheerio rather than cookie crumbs, but she didn't want to lie about it.  She was holding him when she cleaned out the cookie dish and she only gave him a few crumbs because she knows we don't really want him to have that yet.  Likewise, when all the Sunday school kids were drinking chocolate milk and Ayden and Rylee wanted some too, she only gave them a tablespoon each, rather than a cup full, because she knew we didn't want them to have chocolate milk yet.  She wanted to make sure I knew they had that taste though, in case they later had some sort of reaction to chocolate.

I had felt like she was making fun of me all weekend for our decisions not to give them junk food yet, but I know she was only teasing.  She apologized for that.

I'm so glad that I called her on Monday and told her how I was feeling.  I am glad she cares enough and respects me enough to follow up and make sure we are all in a good place.  I can now feel comfortable in knowing that she will respect our wishes when it comes to giving the babies food and that she won't be teasing me about it.  I also feel good in knowing that these types of things will never be kept a secret.  Even if I don't like it, I'd rather know about it when it comes to my babies.

I truly am blessed to have such a good mother-in-law and am so thankful we can have these difficult conversations.

6 comments:

  1. SO GLAD THAT ALL WORKED OUT FOR YOU AND MIL AND ALSO YOUR NIECE!!!!! You are so even tempered, respectful and honest Amber that you should never worry about crossing the line with honesty and this here proves it!!! So glad that she returned your call and discussed the issue with you more and now you both can relax and enjoy those beautiful babies!!!!! Sending oodles of love and hugs to all!! Auntie

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    1. Ha! Snort. I don't feel very even tempered these days. More like short tempered. I'm admittedly not a very patient person. It's exhausting chasing after Ayden and trying to make sure he doesn't hurt himself! Lol

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    2. This just makes me chuckle as now you have Rylee enjoying the shenanigans!! You do have your hands full with these 2 and don't be so hard on yourself!! I have been there and you DO A GREAT JOB even when your patience is running on thin!!! Hang in there because as you already know, those 2 are so worth all of this and I know you get so much joy from them!!!!! PS: I liked what the other anonymous said and your reply! It's all good and I couldn't be happier for all of you! LOVE!!!

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  2. I read your earlier post, and I felt bad for you. I'm glad, though, that you had the courage to call MIL and tell her how you were feeling. It's great that she cared enough to follow up on it with you. She really sounds like a great MIL - not perfect, just human, but willing to apologize and make things right again.
    Susan

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    1. Susan, thank you so much for your comment! We are all imperfect, but that's what keeps life interesting, right? I really did luck out in the in-law department. She may drive me absolutely batty sometimes, but I still love her :)

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  3. I totally missed the original post! Glad you worked things out, though.

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