Monday, November 19, 2012

Losing my Mind

Okay, so we are in the midst of our egg donation/IVF cycle.  Sis just started her injections yesterday with Follistim in the morning and Menopur in the evening.  When we get closer to egg retrieval, she will also add in Ganirelex and Microdose HCG - so 1 injection in the morning and 3 in the evening at that point.

Can I just say that I think it is absolutely amazing that my sister is willing to go through all of this in the hopes that it will work and she will become an Auntie and I will become a Mommy?  Since I've been through 2 IVF attempts already and have done the shots, I know exactly what she is going through!  I have been to all of her appointments so far, with the exception of her appointment with the fertility counselor.  That was for her and her husband as part of the screening process to make sure she was psychologically ready to do this and to talk about any concerns they might have.  We were very excited when she passed the psychological evaluation!  Not that we doubted she would, but we thought it was funny.  After that, she had to complete the rest of the screening process which told us whether she was a good candidate as an egg donor.  She is 32, so her egg production isn't maybe as high as we would like, but she has had 3 babies and the youngest just turned a year old.  She has about 10-12 follicles as of her suppression check.  We do know that her egg quality is high though, and Dr. Wu feels like we have a good shot at success here.

As for me, I am currently following a Lupron/Estrace protocol to build up my endometrial lining in preparation for the embabies (embryo's).  This is the part I am losing my mind!!  I can't remember if/when I take my Estrace pills!  The first 5 days weren't bad as I only had to take one pill every morning and I remembered to actually take it.  Then came 2 pills every day, which started last Thursday on the 15th.  Well last night, I remember thinking about needing to remember to take the evening pill but when the actual time came, guess what?  I forgot!!  I woke up this morning and couldn't remember for SURE if I forgot because I know I remember THINKING about taking it.  Okay, one missed dose maybe won't mess up the cycle too bad.  I emailed my doctor just to double check.  She said we were probably still okay, and just continue as planned, adding in the 3rd pill starting today - one with breakfast, one at lunch, one at night and I continue all 3, plus the Lupron injection until retrieval.  Okay, I can handle that.  So guess what?  At lunch, I remember thinking about taking the little pill, but I don't think I actually did take it!!!  So I counted all the pills left in the bottle, trying to figure it out, counting from day 1 and how many should be left.  Well, if my calculations are correct, I did NOT take it at lunch, so just now took it as it is only a few hours later.  Oh. My. Goodness.  Can I make this ANY harder than necessary??!!?

I should note that I counted them the other morning too, when I couldn't remember if I had taken it that morning.  I was fine so didn't think anything about it.  Now that this has happened 3 times, I feel like I am absolutely losing my mind, or at least my memory!  And I desperately pray that my lining is thickening just like it is supposed to be and that it will be ready to accept those embabies soon.  Now, right this second, I am going to set an alarm on my phone to go off every day at the time I need to take it so I can stop worrying about it and actually remember to take it when I'm supposed to!

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