Wednesday, January 2, 2013

I Caved

I couldn't take it anymore.  I caved and gave into my craving.  That's right, I peed on a stick.  According to the stick, I am still pregnant.  Here is a picture of all the tests I've taken, minus the very first one that was digital, because the digital readout disappeared after about a week or so.  That was a sad day when I couldn't read the word "pregnant" anymore.


The first 3 tests shown here were taken before the beta.  In the picture it appears that the second test line was not as dark, but that is just the glare in the picture.  The line was actually the exact same as the first one.  Then it shows my test last week at 5 weeks, 6 days, and my test today at 6 weeks, 5 days.  Today's test definitely shows the darkest line out of all of them.  I am taking that as a good sign.  I realize if something weren't quite right and there is no heart beat come Monday, there would still be a line showing HCG on the test.  However, wouldn't it maybe be a lighter line if the pregnancy was dying off?  That's just my theory.  As of right now, I am taking it as I am still pregnant because it is the darkest line yet!

I also had a few pregnancy signs today.  For the last 3 years or so, I have eaten an apple or pear and a string cheese for my morning snack almost every single day.  Literally, just about every day that is what I eat.  Well, I can hardly seem to finish my pear lately because I just don't seem to want to eat it and I can hardly stomach string cheese right now.  The other day, I actually threw a small portion of the string cheese away because I just couldn't force myself to eat it.  Today was the same thing.  It just seems to taste really bad to me right now.  I'd say I was just getting sick of eating it everyday, but you'd think after eating it for 3 years, that wouldn't be a problem.  Also, my breasts are definitely more sore today.

Tomorrow we fly to Arizona for our softball tournament.  I am a little nervous about going through airport security with my PIO and needles.  I got a note from the nurse at my clinic when I was there on Monday to excuse the meds so that should be fine.  I also plan to bypass the x-ray and opt for the pat down, which I have never done before.  I'm nervous about how that is going to go, especially since I will be with several people from our team that don't know I'm pregnant.  We'll see how that goes.....

I won't have access to a computer all weekend, so I won't be able to blog.  I will still be checking in on everyone else's blogs from my phone, but I probably won't post anything as it is more difficult on my phone.  We used to have a laptop that we took with us when we traveled, but it died a few months ago.  It was a sad day.

We come back Sunday night, then on Monday will be our next ultrasound!  I am so thankful for the weekend distraction, minus the stress of the airport.  We are also really excited because we have never been to Arizona before.  It's another state we can check off our list!

9 comments:

  1. Hang in there! I'm so excited to hear how things go Monday!!!

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  2. I traveled during my 2nd IVF with a bag full of needles and was all set with my doctors note. I did get pulled aside after my bags went through xray but it was for my contact lens solution. They never questioned my needles, didn't even mention them - in either direction. Yah- feeling real confident in the TSA now. I've also been bypassing the xrays lately as a precaution. I am an expert at the pat down now.

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  3. I would guess that the darker line means more hcg which means growth!!! No heartbeat would mean no growth right?
    You can just whisper to TSA you are preg. Or not give them a reason at all. If anyone on the softball team asks, just say you read an article about it and decided to forego it this time. :-)
    Very excited to hear about Monday!

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    1. Thank you for the advice. It was reading your blog that made me aware of the need to bypass the body scanners. Thank you for that! I'd never even given it a thought before.

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  4. I'm pro at pat down now too, though not as good as my hubby. He has always opted for pat down.

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  5. I just came across your blog and was reading your back story. That is an amazing gift from your sister. We are going through something similar as in I keep having chemical pregnancies. My sister is two years younger and have brought it up to my husband that we could have her donate eggs. Her insurance covers (3) cycles of ivf (don't know if that counts if you are donating eggs or not). Right now he feels we still have a shot using mine.

    I really love your story and hope that you have a wonderful u/s next week.

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    1. Thank you Toni! It is such a blessing to have sister's that we are close to. If you have any questions at all, you can email me at pantheramber@gmail.com

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  6. Hang in there and good luck at the tourney and on Monday!

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  7. I missed a blog! Forgot now what I was checking on to make me realize this but glad
    I back tracked and will continue to. See, thought I was just keeping you informed where I am at but it's helping me find myself too. That being said, I had to laugh
    about it being a sad day when you lost your laptop!!!! It amazes me and exhausts uncle and myself at times how plugged in this younger generation is as I still struggle turning the machine on!!!! Just joking, it's not quite that bad anymore!!! But this is why I struggle with this new fangled technology! It keeps me connected more to those I love!!

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